fiction – Emmanuel Onimisi

Pablo

A story about one dog’s journey home.

Three young dogs were milling about at the rubbish dump one morning, but it was the dump that was the main attraction to the Labrador that was watching from afar.

They called him Bones, and he was the toughest canine in the neighborhood. Whenever there was a fight for territory, once he came on the scene, the fight was over. His howl was the loudest at night, and other dogs could only hope to match his domineering influence. He especially loved rubbing it in their faces. And so, with a smirk on his face, he hurried over to the three and climbed up the dump.

“Now, now,” he said whimsically, “Argue all you want, dawgs, but you know who the real king of this hill is.”

Garr, a cross between an Alsatian and a Terrier, stared up at him. “Hiya, Bones,” he said dryly.

“Now, y’all be nice to me,” Bones continued. “And I’d even let you grab a bite or two from this here dump. I can imagine it must be tantalizing to your eyes right about now, eh?” He licked his lips, but they did not seem amused in the slightest.

“Um… thanks Bones,” Ruff the pug said. “But if Nada here is right, we might not need to come to this dump ever again.”

Bones was taken aback. “Huh?”

Nada was a Doberman, and she was the youngest of the pack. She nodded with glee. “Yeah! There’s this human you’ve gotta meet. He’s really nice and I think he likes me.”

Bones arched a brow. “You’ve got a human? But … but we’re strays. It’s who we are.”

“Yeah, I know,” Nada said, her tail wagging faster as she spoke. “But this guy treats me like I’m a … friend. Anytime he sees me, he pats me on the head and pets me.”

“I’ve never been petted before,” Garr said with a pout.

“Me neither,” Ruff added.

“And he sets out food for me too,” Nada said. “Like I’m his ‘person’. One day he even gave me a bath!”

“A what?!”

“No way! What’s that like?”

Bones watched in disbelief as Nada shared more stories about this human that had caught her fancy. It sounded too good to be true, and Bones knew that human-attachment was a road to heartbreak.

“I’m suspicious,” he said as he approached them. “He your former owner or something?”

“Nope,” Nada said. “I was born on the streets, Bones. I’ve never had an owner before.”

“What do you think, Bones?” Ruff asked.

“I think this is a load of hogwash,” Bones said. “We can never trust the humans. They think we’re pests.”

“This guy doesn’t,” Nada said.

“So what you gonna do?” Bones said, staring her down as he stood in her face. “Take us all over to your human friend so we can be begging for scraps?”

But Nada was not intimidated. “He gives me more than scraps. I think he’s—“

“I mean, look around, dawgs,” he said. “See the assortment of grub we’ve got in this dump. Food from yesterday, some from last week, some from last month – a variety of all kinds just waiting for you to take. And the search, oh, searching through the other garbage and stuff is the real adventure. Getting to taste and spit out the stuff that don’t taste good to your liking, and trying out new stuff. What could be better than that?”

“But it’s not good for you,” Nada said. “Some of it is spoilt. Some of it can kill you.”

“Why?” Bones snapped. “Cause your human’s gon’ give you something better?”

“Actually, yes. And I think he can give us all something better.”

“What if he stops? What if one day he don’t like you no more?”

Bones felt more and more humiliated as Nada extolled the virtues of her friend.

“What’s your damage, Bones?” Garr asked. “Why are you so against this human?”

Bones shook his head. “Trusting humans is dangerous,” he said. “You don’t want to go that route. Once you’re emotionally-invested…” As he spoke, he realized his eyes were getting misted as memories flooded his mind. “No. It’s a can of worms. Just trust me on this. You can’t trust them two-leggers.”

Ruff placed a paw on the ground. “Well I wanna see what Nada be talking about.”

“Me too,” Garr intoned.

“Then come along with me!” Nada said. “He usually has food ready around this time.”

“You’ll come back here!” Bones called after them as they hurried away. “You’ll all come back here. Just you wait and see. Y’all gon’ be back here, with your tails between your legs, begging me to let you come to this dump! You can count on it!”

But as they ran off, their tails wagging in hope, Bones felt defeated. He had had his own experience with a human, and he had seen the slippery slope of trusting a human being. But after the conversation they had just had, the dump was no longer appealing to him. Curiosity got the better of Bones, and he hurried after them, if only to watch from afar.

Nada, Garr and Ruff crossed into the backyard of a quaint house on the edge of the street. Bones hid behind a tree and watched as Nada called.

“Hey!!!” she called. “It’s me, your friend, Nada!”

Bones had to stifle a chuckle. Nada probably forgot that the human would only hear her barking, and not actually hear her words.

But sure enough, a human opened the door. Bones had not seen that coming.

“Ah, Nada!” he came down to his haunches, petting her, her tail wagging like it had a sense of its own. “You came back!” He looked at the other dogs, who were already stepping backwards already. “And you brought friends too!”

He beckoned to them and they sauntered cautiously as he pet them on the head. Sure enough, those tails began to wag like Nada’s. Bones felt sick of it.

The Human held a hand up. “Wait for me, alright. I’ve got food ready.” He hurried into the house and returned with a bag of treats which he poured into bowls for them. “You must be hungry. I’ve got enough to go around.”

Bones had not tasted doggie treats in a very long time. The sight turned his stomach and tugged on his heart. But it was at that moment that he realized that this scene was all too familiar. It dawned on him even more when the human looked his way.

The Human’s eyes widened as he took in Bones from afar. There was a scar on across his left eye.

Oh no… It can’t be.

Bones’ mouth felt dry as he realized that he had known this Human, and the Human knew him. Shame and regret clouded his heart as he took a step back.

Nada looked up and noticed the Human staring, only to turn and see—

“Bones?!” she said.

Bones gasped. I’m not supposed to be here!

He scampered off, blinking away the tears from his eyes. He only stopped to catch a breath behind a wall. Nada’s Human was the same Human he had known all those years ago. He couldn’t believe it. The memory brought nothing but pain.

“Bones?” He turned to see Nada peeking from behind the wall. She came over to him. “Are you okay?”

He wiped a paw across his eyes. “Of course I am. Why wouldn’t I be?”

“Were you crying?”

“Me, cry?” he chuckled. “Don’t be silly. Go on, back to your friends.”

But Nada would not be so easily shrugged off. “You knew him, didn’t you?”

Bones shrugged. “Maybe. I-it doesn’t matter. Just forget about it.”

“Bones, it’s okay. I won’t think of you less.” She sat beside him. “You were once his pet, weren’t you?”

He wanted to deny it once more, but he just couldn’t. He nodded silently.

“What happened?”

There was no pretending with Nada. “You see those scars on his left eye? That…” He lowered his head. “That was me.”

“What?”

He took a deep breath. “It was a different life, a very long time ago. I was his friend too. We played and went everywhere together. He used to call me Pablo, if you can believe it.”

She chuckled. “Pablo,” she whispered, trying it out.

“But one day I saw this dump. I saw all this grub with many scents that I’d never tried before and I knew I just had to get a taste. But he didn’t let me. He kept pulling me away, saying, ‘No, no, don’t go there!’ Until one day I snapped at him and…”

He shut his eyes as he wiped his paw in the air, re-enacting the moment he struck his Human’s face.

“I was stunned, seeing him bleeding that day. He was shocked too, crying on the ground. I didn’t know what to do. I had broken our bond and his trust. I’d drawn his blood. I couldn’t go back again. I had to run away and make a life of my own, far away from him.”

They sat in silence for a moment, staring into the horizon.

“And you’ve been a stray ever since,” she said.

He nodded.

“It wasn’t him that messed up,” Bones said. “It was me. There’s no way he can forgive me for that. He’s Human. They don’t forget stuff. I can never forget that day, myself. It’s why I can’t allow myself to trust a Human again, because I could break that trust one day.”

Nada stared up at him in stunned silence. She didn’t know what to say to that, too.

But in that moment, the Human came from behind the wall. “Pablo?” he called.

Bones gristled, becoming defensive in that moment. He took a step backwards.

“Hey,” the Human said, stretching a hand towards him. “It’s me. Your friend.”

Bones bared his fangs, growling in warning. “Stay away from me,” he said. “I may bite you again!” Of course he knew the Human wouldn’t hear his words, but the growl would pass it across.

“Bones, what’re you doing?” Nada asked.

“Stay out of this,” Bones snarled.

The Human was undeterred. “All these years I’ve been looking for you,” he said. “Thank God you’re still alive. My, what has happened to you, Pablo?”

“Stay back!” Bones warned, barking. “I’m warning you.”

But the Human still approached him cautiously. “I’ve wanted to protect you from the dangers around,” he said. “I want you to be my friend again, Pablo. I want to feed you to good health and take care of you. I don’t want you to be harmed ever again.”

“I’m doing fine all by myself!” Bones snapped. “I don’t need you!”

But the Human would not get the message. He still came closer, reaching out with his arms. “It’s okay, Pablo. I’m not going anywhere. It’s okay.”

Bones kept trying to retreat, growling, but as the Human’s hand touched his head something changed. Sensations he had not felt in a very long time coursed through his body. His resistance withered away as healing flooded his heart.

The Human embraced Bones, and Bones sank into his embrace. All the shame, pain, fear, pride and regret he’d carried all these years were dissolved in the pool of love and acceptance that he plunged into in that moment. His tail began to sway on its own accord.

Is this what it feels like to be loved? Bones mused.

“I’m so sorry,” he said, licking the Human’s facial wound. “I’m so very sorry for all I did.”

“I forgive you,” the Human said, tears in his eyes as well. “I forgave you, Pablo.”

They remained there for a while, as they made up for years of distance and estrangement in that hug. Bones was a baby once again, in the arms of the Human.

Garr and Ruff came around to Nada, shocked at the scene before their eyes.

“I don’t believe it.” Garr said in shock.

“Is that our Bones?” Ruff intoned.

“I’ve never seen his tail wag before.”

“Never knew it even had the capacity to do that.”

“Alright, guys,” Nada said with a smirk. “Let him have his moment.”

The Human looked up at them with joy in his eyes. “Can you believe it? Pablo has returned!”

“Pablo?” Ruff asked.

Nada sighed. “It’s a long story.”

Bones turned to them. “Don’t you tell anyone about this or else—“

“Go tell your friends,” the Human said, oblivious to what he had just said. “Bring them over. We’re gonna have a dog party to celebrate. Pablo has come home.”

Bones sighed. He was going to have to get used to this.

He was loving every second of it. He didn’t know what the future held, but all he knew was that the Human – his Human – loved him and forgave him.

And that was enough for Pablo.

THE END

Likewise, I say to you, there is joy in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.
Jesus (Luke 15:10)

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You can Laugh!

Dayo and Akin learn that a merry heart is good medicine, especially in trying times.

It was another one of those days.

Dayo Jegede was stuck at his friend’s house on a Friday evening, and there was no electric power to do anything. He had been staying with Akin ever since the academia at the university had gone on strike for over five months already. Like millions of Nigerian students, he had tried to invest his attention in online courses and eventually in remote freelance graphic design jobs. Yet, any progress he could have made was affected by the erratic power supply in their area. He was two days late on a flyer design he was meant to send to a client in Norway, his laptop battery was down, his phone battery was teetering on 1%, and Akin’s nonchalant singing in the other room was beginning to get irritating.

Dayo slammed his laptop shut and stomped over to Akin’s room. “Guy, this thing dey tire me,” he said. “I just dey tire.”

Akin smiled. “How e no go ‘Tyre’ you? Oya, come ‘Sidon’ for my side. Make we talk.”

Dayo hissed. “I dey yarn you correct thing, you dey use me crack joke. I swear, I suppose knock you for head.”

“Alright, alright. Sorry. You never eat since, na why you dey frustrated.”

“Abeg, leave that side. I need to get this thing. You get fuel for gen?”

Akin winced. “I suppose buy, but the price don go up. So I no—”

“But them still go sell, shei?” He turned his flashlight to the clock, confirming that the time was a few minutes to 9pm.

“Well … but e go cost o.”

Dayo clapped. “Oya, do fast. Make we go buy fuel. Please, I go add money on top.”

He was well aware that his account was deep in the red, but now he was desperate.

Akin winked. “What if they don close?”

Dayo really did not have the time for banter, so he clenched his fists to ease the pressure that was building up in his arms. “Akin … please…”

Akin did not need further convincing. Within minutes, they were already walking down their street to get to the filling station along the main road. From the houses around them, they could hear the racket of other residential generators, providing electric power for their domiciles. It dawned on him that it had been a long time since they had experienced a truly silent night in their neighborhood.

Another result of this problematic country, he mused, hissing under his breath.

“Have you noticed that the sky is brighter tonight,” Akin asked.

Dayo turned to him. “Hmm?”

“The sky? It’s supposed to be dark, but because of the full moon, it seems a lot brighter.”

Dayo never ceased to be amazed at how Akin always seemed to keep an upbeat disposition despite all they were going through. It bordered on annoying most times, so Akin never dwelt on it.

They met a long queue of cars at the station, and a couple of people with their kegs ready to purchase fuel. Dayo wanted to curse someone, to let off some of the pent-up anger that had been building up within him. It did not help that the other folks in line were discussing the state of insecurity in the country, and the seeming futility of the forthcoming elections.

“All of them are liars,” a pudgy man said. “They only want to fill their own pockets.”

“Abi o,” another added. “None of these politicians can even tell us their plan. The money they used to buy their form, where did they get it, sef?”

“It’s not all of them that have no plan o,” yet another added, and he proceeded to explain why his candidate was the best of all the presidential aspirants. That led to another person praising his own candidate, extolling his effectiveness in potentially changing things.

On and on, the conversation continued while Dayo just shut his eyes and tried to keep his breathing even. He could hear Akin humming somewhere behind him. Neither of them enjoyed engaging in political arguments, especially in these times. They all hoped for better days, but ‘the sufferings of these times’ were so not comparable to ‘the glory’ they hoped would follow. It felt very hard to even hope, sometimes.

It took them close to 30 minutes before they could buy fuel, and they were soon on their way home. Dayo was hungry now, but what was primary on his mind was completing the design job on time. Akin was still humming.

Dayo could not hold it in any longer. “This country is the weapon fashioned against me,” he said. “I hate it here. I just hate it here.”

Akin placed a hand on his shoulder. “Guy…”

“And don’t try to make it sound better,” Dayo snapped.

Akin nodded. “You’re right. It feels hopeless. Many things aren’t working. It can be annoying and frustrating, and so discouraging.” They walked on in silence for a moment. “But do you know what I do, Dayo?”

Dayo arched a brow. “How you dey do am, sef?”

Akin pursed his lips. “I try to keep my mind on what God has done and what God is doing. And I’m thankful…”

Dayo hissed. “Guy, I know that stuff. But in the real world—“

“Real? What’s real? If I complain and mope, what does that give me? Even if issues change or I leave the country, there would always be one problem or the other. But God never changes. He is more real than the problems around us.”

Dayo was not ready to engage on that topic. “You make it sound as if it’s easy.”

“Trust me, man, it’s not always easy. It’s why I sing or listen to songs that keep my heart in that place. ‘A broken spirit dries up the bones, but a merry heart is good medicine’.”

Dayo smirked. “I think you just twisted that verse?”

“Did I? Oh I think I did…”

“But, Akin, this thing hard, true true.”

“Shebi you’re a child of God? And the fruit of God’s Spirit in us is Joy. It doesn’t matter what happens around us, He can help us to be joyful. Joy is a gift. The joy of the Lord is your…”

They were already approaching their apartment, so Dayo ignored him. He hurried towards the generator to fill it with fuel.

“Your strength,” Akin finished. “Come on, man, you left me hanging there.”

“Let us get light first,” Dayo said. “We can continue Sunday School after that.”

Akin helped as they poured in the fuel from the keg into the generator. Dayo could not wait to get back to work. So even though when he pulled on the generator cord it did not come on, he knew that it was just a minor issue. He pulled on the cord again…

…

…and this time, it cut.

For a moment the friends stared in utter shock as what they had thought would be their hope of electricity for the evening was snuffed out before their very eyes. They would have to wait till morning before they could get an engineer to fix this. Dayo stared at the broken cord in his hands, with no plan or course of action coming to mind.

With nothing left to do, he turned to Akin, whose hands were on his head. In the silence that followed, the inevitability of it all dawned on them, and they burst into laughter.

For Dayo, it was a nervous laughter of exhaustion, as the realization that there was nothing more he could do about his problems. Yet the more he laughed, the harder it became to stop laughing. The laughter made him feel lighter, like there was nothing more he could do. He was out of control as he sank to his knees and pounded the ground with his fist, choking on hysterics.

“Why you dey beat the ground?” Akin said between guffaws. “Wetin the floor do you, na?”

Dayo managed to make out the words, “Why are we laughing? We dey mad?”

“Don’t you see, Dayo? God is with us! Everything don mess up, but we can still laugh! We still have Joy. Isn’t that something to be grateful for?”

Dayo did not feel the confidence Akin professed, but at that moment, he wished he did. God had given them reasons to smile and laugh and, even now when things seemed bleak, he could still laugh.

Electric power was not restored that night, and Dayo had to turn in the design the next day. However, even though nothing changed, Dayo’s burdened heart was a little lighter that evening.

And that, he realized, was something to be thankful for.

THE END

Hi there, dear reader. Many times we go through situations that impose the bleakness of the times on our consciousness. The news seems choked with bad news many times, and it many times looks as though things are just getting worse around us.

But God is still in control. He’s still got the whole world in His hands. His Spirit within you can keep you Joyful. Happiness is based on what ‘happens’, but Joy is irrespective of what happens. In His joy there is strength to keep on standing, strength to do what you need to do, and you are lightened to even hear and see the wisdom and direction He may be showing you out of the darkness.

I pray that you find reasons to laugh, my friend, and that you keep on laughing. Be strengthened.

Did this bless you?

Have you had a similar experience you would like to share?

Do you need someone to pray with you in what you’re going through?

Please share and let me know in the comments. You just might be a blessing to someone here. Trust me, we all need it.

The Step Down

For one president, the way up may be to step down.

The Mind Council Chamber sat at the lowest floor of the Presidential Villa, several stories below ground, inaccessible to all except the Federal Executive Council. We only held meetings there when very important decisions were to be made.

I was the first to be seated along with my Guest, as the Federal Commissioners walked in one by one. In their flowing regalia they all trooped in, each bearing one responsibility or the other. I smirked as I thought of the many arguments we had had over the past couple years, and how many times they had prevailed over my decisions with their many ideas birthed from their varied exposure and expertise. In many ways, I felt intimidated by them. There was an air of concern as they all took their seats, watching me eerily and casting glances at my Guest every occasionally.

When they were all seated, I stood.

“Distinguished ladies and gentlemen,” I began, “Thank you for honouring my invitation for this impromptu meeting. There’s precious little that would make me call you urgently from your domiciles at this time of the night.”

I could see the Commissioner of Sight nodding vigorously. He always appreciated his sleep and never appreciated disturbance. He had been known to doze off at meetings every now and then.

I cleared my throat. “The path to where we are as a nation has been one of ups and downs. We’ve made many decisions on policies regarding the nation, and our surrounding neighbors, in this very room. We have debated ideas, had our arguments, celebrated the victories of some of our decisions and also shared in the blame for some of the losses too.”

The Commissioner of Thought grunted. “That’s what you think,” she said. “I never lose.”

That elicited chuckles across the room.

I took a deep breath as I got to the core. “I take responsibility for every failure,” I said. “I have tried, God knows I’ve tried. I’ve tried out new paradigms and systems to satisfy our urges and needs, but while many of them persisted for a while, none has fully served their purpose. We have sought consultations from experts, held numerous training-and-upgrade seminars, and … yet, I can’t help but think that this country … this council is not serving its rightful purpose. I fear that we’re on a road to doom.”

“Isn’t it obvious?” the Commissioner of Emotions interjected. “We always come with ideas from what we’ve seen and heard and felt, but you’re always the one second-guessing us.” There were murmurs in the affirmative all around. “Yes, because if anything, you’ve been our weakest link. You’re supposed to be President, but you never have the right ideas. With all due respect, you suck, Mr President!”

“I’m telling you!” the Commissioner of Speech added. “If it weren’t for our ideas, you could never make a good decision.”

“Yet some ideas are better than others,” the Commissioner of Action said.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I’m just saying. Actions speak better than words.”

And that is how the arguments began again, each trying to overshadow the other. But the Commissioner of Thought, ever the introspective one, had been watching me silently. “Why have you called us here, Mr President? And, if I may ask, who is your Friend?”

She was the first to acknowledge my Guest, even though I am sure most of them must have been wondering Who He was all along. I stared up at my colleagues. “We need new leadership. We need to realign to what the Creator made us for. I have … we have done a good job of messing things up. I think it’s time for a change. And that is why … I am stepping down as Commander-in-Chief of the Federal Republic of You.”

It was as though the air was sucked from the room in the silence that followed. They stared at me, waiting for the other foot to drop.

“While I remain as President, I am handing over authority over myself and this nation to this Man here,” I said, gesturing to my Guest. “His name is –“

“Jesus Christ?!” the Commissioner of Hearing interrupted. “I’ve heard a lot about this guy! You’ve got to be kidding me!”

“I’m sorry?”

“This Jesus turns people into weaklings!” the Commissioner continued. “I heard he turns people into mindless religious zombies. We don’t need this in our nation.”

“They say He stifles our free speech,” the Commissioner of Speech added, and he swore for good measure.

The arguments started rising once again, and I knew that getting them to calm down would be a herculean task. But Jesus placed a hand on my shoulder. “Let Me take it from here,” He said.

As He stood in the room, the arguments stilled as they sized up the new guest. I felt more confident with Him by my side.

“Before You were formed in your mother’s womb,” Jesus said. “I knew You. I made You for a purpose.”

“Excuse me,” the Commissioner of Thought interjected. “Are you claiming to have made this nation? How old are you? Who do you think you are?”

I did not see his face at the moment, but something about the way he stared at the Commissioner of Thought made her to recoil in silence.

“Sin and its corruption have made a mess of the order here,” he continued. “You, Federal Commissioners, have been compromised by the decadence of the age and are now imposing its pressures and suggestions on your president, at the expense of sound judgment. That something is lawful does not mean that it’s always right or hlpful

He turned to me. “Your president here has tried on his own to repair the damage, but he was never strong enough. He was never meant to debate with you about what is right and wrong. I am here to help him make the Federal Republic of You what God intended it to be. It would mean a renewal of this Mind Council, so that you all can know what you ought to do, and to do it too.”

For the first time in my life, I felt confident. There really was going to be hope for us. But my Commissioners did not share the same sentiments.

“So what?” the Commissioner of Thought said. “You’re going to be some kinda Dictator or something?”

Jesus folded his arms, standly regally. “I am a King, actually, and I am bringing my kingdom here. And in my kingdom it’s all about pleasing God, living at peace, and the joy that comes from God’s Spirit.”

“And are those supposed to mean something?”

He winked. “Trust me, you’re going to find out soon enough. I am going to help you think the right thoughts by teaching you in my Word.”

“And why should I listen to you?”

He gestured towards me. “Because your president has placed me in-charge here, and you are subject to the law he is subject to. Before, he found himself doing the things he did not want to do, and not doing things he knew he ought to do. You have known that conflict too, madam, haven’t you? But now I’m bringing him under a new law: the Law of the Spirit of Life in Me.”

She blinked, and when she spoke her words came out with less resistance. “It’s not been easy,” she said. “There’s so much information we get, and we have to act on it.”

“You never had to,” Jesus said. “But you weren’t strong enough to resist. I will help you. Madam, it may seem tough now but, believe me, everything I’m doing here is for your own good. There are boundless possibilities for the Commission of Thought that you’re not exploring because you’re limited to what you know. But I can help you get there.”

The Commissioner of Thought considered that for a moment, but at least she was silent now.

Jesus turned to the Commissioner of Speech. “And it would influence Speech too,” he said.

The Commissioner of Speech raised his hands. “Whoa, leave me out of this, mister. I’m fine the way I am.”

Jesus smirked. “Oh, that’s what you think. Your Speech will do so much more. You will bring healing to many, salvation to many more, encouragement to the broken and comfort to the mourning. I will train your tongue, to speak the right word in season to the weary. Can you imagine just what we can do when your words are life?”

He was genuinely amazed. “I never thought that could be possible. I thought you just wanted to, you know, keep me from saying whatever I want to. I may want to just catch cruise every once in a while, and I don’t need to be stuck up with a guilty conscience every single time.”

“But your words can get you in trouble,” Jesus said. “And can hurt others and yourself, much more than you know. I can help you refine your words.”

The Speech Commissioner grunted. “I uh … I guess I could do with a fixer-upper,” he said.

Jesus smiled as he turned to the Commissioners of Sight and Hearing.

“Oh no, no, no,” the Commissioner of Sight said. “You’re not coming here.”

“Yeah,” the Commissioner of Hearing said. “I don’t need your help.”

But Jesus wasn’t done. “You sure? Sight, some of the things you’re looking at are affecting Thought.”

The Commissioner of Thought nodded. “Exactly! The information we get comes from these guys.”

“Hey, you can decide what to think by yourself,” the Commissioner of Hearing retorted. “Don’t blame us for your lack of control.”

“But it’s true,” Jesus said. “Even for you, Hearing. The things you watch and listen to get into your thoughts one way or the other. You need to keep a watch over them.”

Sight folded his arms. “You just wanna suck the joy out of everything.”

Jesus chuckled. “All things are lawful for You, but not all things are expedient. All things are lawful for You, but you don’t have to become a slave to them*. If you absolutely can’t do without something, tell me, are you the master or the slave to it?”

They were clearly gearing up for a comeback, but they could not come up with anything in time. We all knew that we needed all the help we could get, and Jesus was the one to help us. It may not have felt nice, but it was worth it. It reminded me of the one time I heard that he had chased out some moneychangers from God’s Temple. This kinda felt like it too.

And one by one, Jesus kept on addressing each of the commissioners, analyzing their blueprints and the challenges they had faced, and explaining how He would make it new. I was so glad I brought Him onboard. I was learning as he taught us, gaining more confidence to guide each of these commissions with his wisdom and might. It would take a while to get into the new hanfg of things, but I knew I was now in good hands.

“It’s going to be a new day,” Jesus said. “The old is gone, the new has come.”

“Indeed,” I muttered under my breath, a smile on my face. “Amen.”

THE END

Overwhelmed

Some days are just worse than others.

The clack of Tobi’s shoes resounded in the hallway as he approached the Director’s Office, folder in hand. He snapped his fingers in greeting to others as they passed, sharing the occasional ‘Chairman!’ or ‘My guy!’ to those whose names he didn’t know (and whose names he had no intention of asking for because after working with them for close to four years already, that would be all kinds of awkward!)

He peeked into the large main office area where Miss Ekaette sat behind her desk outside the Director’s office. A CNN newsfeed was streaming over the flat-screen television on the opposite wall. “Good morning, young lady!” he exulted.

She looked up from her laptop briefly. “Mr. Owoeye,” she said with a nod.

He let himself in. “Please, Mr. Owoeye was my Dad.”

She smirked, shaking her head. “Keep using lines like that and you just might end up a Nollywood character from 2002. You’ve got the loud shoes down already.”

“Heh, touché. I was just passing by so I thought, hey, I might as well just share my report early.” He pulled out a USB stick from his pocket. “It’s all in there. Typed, edited and justified.”

Ekaette stared at stick. “And you could not just mail it in like a normal person?”

“Who said I was normal?”

He wasn’t sure if he saw her roll her eyes at that. It was hard telling expressions these days, behind the masks everyone was wearing. “Well, you’re sha not putting that flash on my system,” she said. “I don’t need to be battling viruses at this time.”

“But I thought you were vaccinated.”

She did not respond for a while, typing away on her system. “When you’re tired you’ll go back and mail it in.”

He nodded, tapping his fingers on the armrests. “Good talk. I’ll just let myself out, then.”

He could not wait to get out, with the awkwardness of it all. This was probably not the best time for banter, he figured. Nevertheless, even when he got to the door, something about it all made him pause. Miss Ekaette was generally always cynical, yes, but something about today gave him a little concern. He was not sure if he was overthinking it, but he just could not leave yet.

“Are you alright, Ekaette?”

She stole a brief glance at him, continuing with her work. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

His hand was still on the doorknob, but he could not leave just yet. “Are you?”

This time she looked up at him, squinting as she weighed his words. “Are you really asking?” she asked.

He did not know which way to respond just yet. It felt awkward. He felt stupid. He considered throwing in a random pun to lighten the mood and get out of the moment.

“How am I?” She pushed her laptop away, flicked her braids out of her eyes and buried her face in her palms. Her voice came out as a hoarse whisper. “Honestly, I don’t know.”

Now Tobi knew his premonition was valid. He pulled up a chair and took a seat.

God, what do I say? Am I supposed to say something?

“It’s just … too much,” Ekaette said, pulling down her mask. “I mean, every day you think it can’t get any worse but it just keeps getting worse, and worse, and worse.” With each ‘worse’, she banged her fist on the table. Tobi had never seen her so emotionally expressive, and it was awkward for him. “Every single day…”

For the first time in a very long time, he felt stuck. He was used to interjecting conversations with the odd quip or pun, but even he knew that those would be inappropriate now.

God, please show me what to say. Don’t leave me hanging here.

“So much on my mind to settle,” she continued. “And I have no idea where to start. I can barely concentrate. Like, I have been on this page for hours now, and I have no idea where my mind has been. I’ve not figured out how to settle my rent yet, and it’s due by the end of next month. It’s just the first week of July and there’s too much month at the end of my money!”

Tobi winced, trying to understand that last sentence. “I think you meant—“

“Oh, I meant what I said. Transport, food – everything just keeps sapping my account dry like there’s no tomorrow because of this messed up godforsaken country! And, oh, don’t even get me started about how messed up the country is. Just thinking about it makes me … weak.”

She wrapped herself in her arms, rocking as she spoke. “Every day there’s a new low. After last October, something snapped within me. It’s as if every hope I had that we could change this system and make it better just … died. It feels like the end of the world, but the world just doesn’t want to end yet.”

Tobi nodded quietly. She was referring to the protests against police brutality in 2020, the narrative of which was hijacked by malefactors and overshadowed by political agendas. It had come to a peak with the mass shooting of protesters at Lekki in Lagos, an evil further aggravated by the large scale attempts at a cover up or, worse, to trivialize its implications. The issues plaguing the country for decades had already suffocated many a Nigerian’s hope in the nation, but October 2020 was the last straw for the younger generation, awakening them to the reality their forbears had been facing for generations.

Tobi was grateful that he did not need to speak just yet. The more silent he was, the more she was able to talk. Perhaps that was a good thing, he surmised.

“And the news!” Ekaette continued, pointing at the television overhead. “The kidnappings and attacks. Terrorists, bandits, insurgents … whatever new word they come up with. Do you know the worst part? It’s that the casualties have become nothing but numbers to me now. 50, 500, 490 … just numbers. I’m just numb anytime I hear of another attack.” She shook her head at the thought. “I feel nothing. I’m just a terrible person.”

Tobi had taken the cue to go turn off the TV while she spoke. He did not feel any less awkward. Was he to place a hand on her shoulder, or give a hug, or just sit and feel as stupid as he already felt? This was uncharted territory for him, and he felt helpless. He could identify with much of what she said. “You’re not a terrible person,” he managed.

But Ekaette wasn’t done. “And even now, when I’m supposed to be doing my work, I don’t have the strength to get anything done! I dare not even get on WhatsApp, otherwise people would know that I’m online and I’ve seen their messages. I don’t have the strength to respond to anyone. That notification bell sickens me now. I feel like such a failure. I can’t do anything right. Me with my scatterbrain and…” She placed her head on the table. “I can’t. I just can’t.”

Tobi stared at her, wondering what to say. If he was to be honest, he felt the same way a lot of the time. Most jokes at the country’s expense were Nigerians’ attempts to get through another dreadful day, really.

He placed a hand on hers. “Hey. It’s going to be okay.”

“Come on, you don’t really believe that.”

He hesitated before responding. “I know what it’s like to be overwhelmed,” he said. “Maybe it’s not the same as what you feel, but I have felt my own share.”

She sat up and stared at him, her hair tussled around her face. Having to stare at her while talking made it feel harder, so he avoided her gaze.

“Believe me, I know. A lot of this is messed up,” he said, gesturing around. “All of this makes no sense. Everything is going crazy. I get it.”

She just stared, but she still looked disheveled and spent. “You know, you don’t have to try to help if you’ve got nothing to say. It’s perfectly alright.”

He exhaled. “Phew, thanks.”

“I think I just needed to vent.”

“It do be like that sometimes. I couldn’t even come up with a good motivational speech. I drew a blank there.”

At least they were able to smile at that.

“You know what I tell myself when I feel I can’t do anything right?” Tobi asked. “I choose to do what’s ‘left’.” He grinned, but she didn’t seem to get the joke. “You know, ‘cause the opposite of right is—“

“I got it,” she said, not even amused in the least.

Ok, you went too far that time, Tobi.

“Maybe you might need to just stay off the news for a while. No breaking news for a while. Maybe even put your phone on ‘Silent’ or something, so that the ringing doesn’t get to you too much. At least until you can handle it.”

“Yeah, like I haven’t thought about that before,” she muttered sarcastically. “But thanks. I’ll … I’ll do that.”

Tobi took a deep breath. Maybe all she really needed was an ear, and he was perfectly fine with that. But he could see himself in her words too.

“There’s this verse in the Bible that says, ‘When my heart is overwhelmed, lead me to the Rock that is higher than I.’* I guess, sometimes, when things are out to overwhelm me, I’m learning that I need to remember that God is bigger than it all. He promised to never leave us or forsake us**. We can trust that He will keep His word.”

She wiped a tear. “At this point, that’s easier said than done.”

“Times are hard. But God is still good.” He noticed she smirked and shook her head. “What?”

“It’s easy to draw the ‘God card’ when you don’t have the answers. Just throw in a little Christianese and we’ll convince ourselves that every problem is just sorted out.”

He thought about that. “Well … I actually don’t have all the answers, yes. And … you’re kind of right.”

She was visibly surprised at that. “Really?”

“That, yeah, some of us have the tendency to cover our problems with an ‘It is well’ or ‘May God sha help us’, or something. But it doesn’t mean that there isn’t something real to all this. Our very real challenges make us want to find something real that we can hold on to. Everything that’s fake fades away when push comes to shove. I believe that, beyond the appearances and doubts and stuff, there is still something real here.”

She folded her arms. “I don’t follow.”

Tobi did not feel equipped for an apologetic discussion. He could only speak from his thoughts and experiences. “The way I see it, at this point, it’s either God is real or He’s not. All His promises to protect and preserve us in the midst of trouble, it has to be true. And if it is, I believe that I’m going to see it, God’s goodness. Unless, of course, it’s not real. And if it’s not, well … it would fade away in the face of adversity.”

He wondered what was going on in her mind through all of this. She just kept staring at him incredulously. “People have suffered and died,” she said. “Some of them even prayed. Doesn’t that prove that God does not solve everything? Or that, maybe, all of this is just in our heads?”

He had thought about that many times. “You know, He never actually promised that we would never suffer. Jesus did say that there would be challenges and tribulations, but He also reminded us that but that He has overcome. If we really trust Him, I guess we have to believe that that’s the Truth; that He has overcome, and that we have also.”

“But what does that even mean?” Ekaette asked. “But when it comes right down to it, how does that change anything in these very real experiences? How does that put money in my account?”

He shrugged. “I don’t know. But I think it means that He can deliver us from our challenges. But even if challenges rush in like a flood, they will not drown us. When it appears they’d consume us like fires, they’ll not burn us either***. When we walk through the darkness of pain and the unknown, He will be our light****.”

She shook her head. “You’re just full of those, aren’t you? You’ve got a verse for everything.”

He couldn’t help but smile. “Well, not everything … yet,” he said with a wink.

“But you truly believe this stuff?”

“Honestly, many times I need to remind myself. It’s why I keep the Word on my mind. Just saying them out right now is me reminding myself too.”

She exhaled. “But do you really believe that stuff?”

“I believe…” Tobi paused here. He thought about this all the time. When the pandemic and lockdowns had begun, he had needed to face up to questions about his faith and what he truly believed. The basis of his trust and of his life had stared him in the face more now than ever, and in the months hence, he had come from questions to answers to even more questions.

He knew that he could have easily given an answer that tied everything up positively in a neat bow. However, he could be nothing here if not honest.

“I believe that … even though I can’t see or feel like it sometimes, God is still with me because He’s promised. He is true to His promise. Even when it’s hardest, and. Even in my questions, and oh, I have so many, I believe He’s guiding me in Truth. I don’t understand everything now, but gradually I’ll get to know what’s most important much better. I believe He can strengthen me when it’s getting heavy. And I believe that, even if the challenges eventually end me … well, that’s not the worst that could happen.”

She blinked. “As far as pep talks go, that was not one.”

“No, I’m serious. We’re all leaving the planet someday, whether we’re astronauts or not.” She didn’t react to that one either, so he moved on. “But Jesus defeated death, and because I have received His gift, I have won too. I don’t have to fear Death. What can Death do to me, if not to take me home to my Father?”

She ruminated on his words. “Yeah, that doesn’t sound suicidal at all.”

“Au contraire. How I live is different, even with all its challenges. Because we don’t have to fear death, we can confidently live and do much more, even when it’s hard. We’ve got God’s very life on our insides. He gives us wisdom on what to do and where to go, and we can be joyful in the midst of challenges. Even when it’s tough, He can still make me a blessing and encouragement to others. Like He’s doing right now.”

Ekaette arched a brow. “Really?”

“Really really.”

She picked up her phone and swiped through. “Nope, my bank account’s still the same. Nothing’s changed.”

He chuckled. “C’mon Ekaette. You’re feeling better already, admit it.”

She waved a hand dismissively. “Meh.”

“Well, it’s not about feelings.”

“Nice speech, though.”

“Nice speech?! I was pouring my heart out here!”

She scrunched her nose. “I don’t think I feel different. Sorry. No dice.”

He shook his head. “And here I was going to pray with you, but clearly you’re not taking any of this seriously.” He pushed himself to his feet. “At least I tried.”

“Might as well just pass the offering plate now,” she said whimsically as he headed for the door. “Hey, Tobi!” He turned. “Thanks a lot. For listening. For everything.”

He smiled. “Anytime. About your work, just take it in stride. One at a time.”

“Yeah. But I could do with a break sometime too.”

“Yes. As soon as you can, take it.”

“And that thing you said about … you know, praying for me? I could probably do with some of that too.”

For what it was worth, Tobi realized that the inclination to wait behind was probably for a reason. Ekaette was bursting with questions and full of doubt, but he was here. Perhaps, in one small way, God wanted him here for her, even in her questions and doubt.

“It would be my genuine pleasure,” he said.

Hi there! Emmanuel here!

Many of us the world over are going through some very difficult times out here. But, like Tobi, I pray for you that the Lord keeps your heart at rest and at peace. I pray that your heart is receptive to hear the songs of deliverance He is singing over you. I pray that He strengthens you on the inside and keeps you aglow, no matter how dark it is out there. I pray that you remain strong in faith, able to stand in the day of adversity.

I pray that your confidence in His Love is unshaken, and that you are an effective channel of His love to others.

And I pray that, when your heart is overwhelmed, you remember the Rock that is higher than all your problems.

God loves you, and He is for you.

In Jesus’ Name.

Amen.

VERSES MENTIONED

From the end of the earth I call to You, when my heart is overwhelmed and weak; Lead me to the rock that is higher than I. (Psalm 61:2)
Keep your lives free from the love of money, and be content with what you have, for God has said, “I will never leave you or abandon you.” (Hebrews 13:5)
Jacob, the LORD created you. Israel, he made you, and now he says, “Don’t be afraid. I saved you. I named you. You are mine.

When you have troubles, I am with you. When you cross rivers, you will not be hurt. When you walk through fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not hurt you. (Isaiah 43:1,2)

Even if I walk through a valley as dark as the grave, I will not be afraid of any danger, because you are with me. Your rod and staff comfort me. (Psalm 23:4)

What do you do when you are overwhelmed? Have you ever felt overwhelmed? Kindly share your experiences.

Thank you!

Character Development in Writing Fiction

Download tips on ‘Character Development in Fiction Writing’ right here!

Hi there! 👋🏼
I recently had the honour of teaching on Character Development in Fiction Writing in a creating writing workshop organised by the wonderful people at Christian Literary Hub. It was a great time and I hope they enjoyed it as much as I did.

I prepared the slides as a take-away exclusively for participants but now it’s available for everyone that’s interested. It’s a compendium of lessons I’ve learnt from others and in the course of my writing.
We covered story, what makes your story stand out, why your characters and their journeys are also important, how to make your charaters relatable, and so much more.

They are certainly not exhaustive, but they should be enough to stir you up on your way to creating compelling and relatable characters that give your stories life and that your readers would love.

While I am not the best at what I do yet, all I’ve learnt so far was because of resources provided by those alongside me and those that had gone on ahead of me. That’s why it’s my joy to share these tips with you.

To download Character Development in Fiction Writing click the image above or click here!

P.S.: I’ve got something in the pipeline including tips and tutorials for creatives, not only writers. So to stay in the loop, don’t forget to follow this blog! 😉 You’ll be the first to know.

PORTAL: An Afterword

Hi there! Emmanuel here!

If you’re here too then I assume you’ve read my story, Portal. Thank you so much. I’d really love to hear your thoughts. If you haven’t already, click on the link right here.

The undercurrent of Portal, is that many of us find ourselves held back by things in our past.

Like Tolu, some of us are encumbered by the fear of the future and its uncertainty.

Like Riley, many of us are affected by the pain and hurts we have experienced in the past.

And, like Frank, many of us are held back by the guilt of the wrongs we’ve done, and by the pain we’ve inflicted on others.

Moving on from these is never easy. I have experienced all three of these, and I have seen how they have influenced my actions, affected how I related with people, and determined the decisions I made. Unknowingly, I was trapped in those points in time and was navigating the present from those places. Influenced by the insecurities of my guilt, protective because of the hurts I experienced, limited by the uncertainties of what lay ahead.

I wish I could say there is a portal of some kind that you can pass through that will makes those things fade away. But then, I have found that there is. This story is a picture of how, through Jesus, we can find the confidence, healing and forgiveness we need to face the future.

For those of us afraid of the future and its uncertainty, He encourages us to trust in Him. Trusting Him means following Him. When we do, He will guide us every step of the way. We may not know where we ought to be five years from now, but at least we know He is with us and we know how He expects us to navigate the times. He is our Light, so we never have to walk in darkness. He has given us His Word so that we can learn of Him and know what He desires. His Word is like a lamp to our feet and a light to our paths (Psalm 119:11).

For those of us held back by the pain of our past, who find ourselves responding to people and circumstances from that hurt, He empathises. He promises healing for the broken hearted (Luke 4:18) and joy in the places of weeping (Psalm 30:5). He will carry you and keep you through it all.

And for those of us who can’t get past the fact that we have hurt someone, inflicted pain on someone, ruined something… Guilt is terrible in that it makes us feel we’ve earned the darkness it brings us into. Guilt is painful, no matter how earned it is. And while, yes, conviction is good, Jesus offers to all that come to Him forgiveness. Forgiven, He gives us the strength to forgive ourselves. And for those who we have hurt, we find the strength to apologise, to mend the friendships we can.

As one who is navigating these zones too, I cannot say I have all the answers. Many of these things, I have to keep reminding myself of every single day; that I have hope in Christ, that He has healed me, and that I am forgiven.

Our stories may differ, but there is the One Portal through which, if we take it, He will lead us in the right ways our souls have always yearned for. It’s called ‘the path of righteousness’ (Psalm 23:3). We will find our solace and peace in Him, and we can enjoy every moment of every day, just as He intended it.

In His Light, we see that He had given Time meaning.

Time in itself is seemingly amoral, giving as much opportunities for decay and corruption as it does for growth and development. The difference is what we do with it. When we are in Christ, He gives us wisdom on how to navigate these times and to make the best of them.

Ephesians 5:17 puts it this way:

Make good use of every opportunity you have, because these are evil days.

Don’t be fools, then, but try to find out what the Lord wants you to do.

I take special comfort in one of David’s Psalms in 31:15 where he says:

My times are in thy hand: deliver me from the hand of mine enemies, and from them that persecute me.

He was confident that, even though he had enemies, he had help because his times were in God’s hands. It reminds me that, it doesn’t matter what season I am in: be it a height or a low, a win or a loss, as long as I am following Jesus, I am in God’s hands.

He will perfect all that concerns me.

From someone who is learning along the way, I pray you find the healing and strength in Jesus to move on. There is so much more to life that He has for you. You’ve got a whole lifetime to discover it.

God bless you all!

PORTAL (6 of 6): Home

It was December 31, the last day of 2019, and Riley Harris was back at the party in Brisbane. The house will flooded with pulsating lights and music blared from the DJs stand.

She blinked, taking in the world around her. She had thought she would die when stepping off that cliff, but here she was.

She was back.

Oh snap! She was back!

She fished out her phone from her pocket. It read 11:52pm.

Shannon tapped her shoulder. “Hey, girl friend!” She had arrived with the shots. “Where’ve you been?”

Riley collected her glass, studying her friend. “Shannon?”

Shannon cocked her head. “Please tell me you haven’t tried the good stuff yet.”

She wasn’t flickering. Riley reached out to touch her arm. She was real! “I’m actually back!!!”

She dropped her glass and embraced Shannon, jumping with glee.

“Shannon, I’m back!!!”

Shannon pulled away, picking her steps among the shattered glass at her feet. “OK, I’m completely freaked out now.”

“Shannon, what time is it?”

“What time is it? Are you OK in the head, Riley?”

Riley didn’t know where to begin. She didn’t know how to begin.

She hurried away, feeling the mass of humanity around her. They were all real.

It wasn’t until she eventually made her way out of the building that she could actually breathe fresh air. There were fireworks in the distance, and music from different buildings all around. Ah, how she had missed the feeling of the breeze on her skin. Back in the Timescape the air was still.

Shannon was not far behind. “Riley, where’re you going?”

“I’m sorry, Shannon. It’s just … all of this is so real.” She raised her hands to feel the breeze.

“OK, I don’t know what Todd put in your drink but you’re high out of your mind, girl. Now you’re going to sit down right now and get a hold of yourself—“

Riley grabbed her hands. “Shannon, Shannon, look at me. I am not high. I just … I feel alive for the first time in a long time.”

Shannon smiled. “I did tell you the party will get you out the dumps, didn’t I?”

Riley knew it wasn’t the party, but she didn’t know how to frame it. “Shannon I’ve needed help for so long.”

“Yeah, we tell you that all the time. You’re sick in the head, but we love ya. This New Year, we’ll make sure there’s no time to think too hard on all the trash that’s bothered you, alright Riley?”

She shrugged. “I, uh … I think I’m just going to sit outside here for a while.”

Shannon frowned. “Why don’t I feel OK about that?”

“I’m not going anywhere, Shan. Look into my eyes. I am fine. I just want some … fresh air.”

Shan actually stepped closer. “There’s a first. Usually you’re the party animal and I’m the sane one.”

“Go have fun, Shan. I’ll be right here.”

“Alright!” Shannon stepped toward the door. “Come in soon, OK?”

She nodded. “Now go!”

Riley sat on the doorstep, staring into the sky. It was so good to see lights again.

But she still had questions. Had all of that really happened? Had she been hallucinating? She knew she hadn’t. She just didn’t know where to go from here.

“God,” she said. “I still don’t know if you really are there. But if You are, they say you can heal me of what has hurt me. I admit, I have carried this pain all this time. I’m really not sure if you are listening. But now I know there is so much more going on than meets the eye. If you really have healing for me, I want that. I want it. If You’ve got something better for me, I really want to know You.”

——

It was December 31, the last day of 2019, and Tolu was back in the car, on the way to church.

The phone was in his hands, and his parents were in front.

I’m home! I’M HOME!

He was so overcome, he didn’t know what to say. He just reached over around his Mum’s seat and hugged her.

Thank you, God. Thank you!

Mum was shocked. “Ah-ah, Toluwanimi? Sho wa okay bayii? (Literally, ‘Are you OK?, but contextually, ‘Are you OK in the head?!’)”

“I’m just happy to see you again, Mum!”

She actually didn’t know how to respond at first. “Aw, my boy. I don’t know how God blessed me with a gift like you.”

Out of the corner of his eye he noticed his father smile.

“I love you too, Dad!”

“Hey, hey, don’t even try and touch me now,” Dad warned as he drove. “Nonsense. I’m still not buying that shoe for you.”

Mum turned to him. “Ah-ah, Honey! Appreciate your son, jo!”

“It’s alright, Dad,” he said. “The shoe is the last thing on my mind right now. I’m just happy to be back … here with you.”

Dad nodded slowly, taking it in. “It’s alright.” He shook his head, wondering what was wrong with his boy.

Tolu sat back in his seat, remembering the last time he had been here. Every second now meant something to him. He just kept staring at his parents as the whispered the rest of their conversation.

He remembered where he’d been, and he remembered what had taken him there. Was the Timescape real?

“Mummy,” he said. “I have a question.”

“What is it, my dear?”

“Is it possible for someone not to enter the New Year?”

She paused a moment to consider that before she hit the chair. “You will make it into the New Year in Jesus Name! Stop using your mouth to say dangerous things like that!”

“No, I mean—“

“Instead of you to be talking with God about your future,” Dad said. “You’re busy thinking about something like that.”

He figured it would be difficult to explain, so he let it lie. “It’s alright.”

“Maybe it’s those cartoons he’s been watching.”

“It haff do,” Mum said. “Oya, start praying in your seat. I must see you praying!”

Tolu smirked at his mother’s training methods, but he knew she meant well. He leaned against the window, praying. As he stared at the world around – living, bright, full of colour and moving people – he wondered what each of them was going through. The fears and concerns and insecurities they may harbour. Just like he had.

He had been quoting prayers he heard a lot when he stopped. It was time to actually have a conversation. “Lord, I don’t know what’s next. But I know You must. I don’t want to stay stuck in the past or in a moment. So I’ll … enter the unknown with You. I will trust You, and I will seek You. Help me find You.”

—–

It was December 31, the last day of 2019, and Frank Aldrin found himself in Times Square, New York.

The sudden change of scenery jolted him for a moment. It was a cold night, with snow all around. Digital billboards on the sides of buildings were lit with motion adverts of upcoming movies and products. Some still had Christmas decorations on.

It worked! Good golly, it worked!

“…so that’s why I took Benny to his cousin’s school, instead.” A lady was walking beside him, talking to him. He wasn’t sure why he recognised her, but he did. It was when he saw her face that he realised who it was.

Her face. Her disfigured left cheek and smaller left eye. The tiny dots where repeated suturing had been done over the years. The girl he had known 37 years ago had grown. He couldn’t believe it.

“Darlene?”

She turned to him. “Hmm?”

He couldn’t believe his eyes. This woman, probably in her mid-thirties, was his own daughter, Darlene!

“You’re … here?”

She seemed confused as to why he would ask that question. “Yeah. I am here, like I told you before. My interview this Friday brought me to New York, that’s why I’m not with them. Brian and Benny understand that I’m here.”

This was his daughter, Darlene, all grown up and now a wife and a mother. Memories of the years since he’d been trapped in the Timescape came filtering in, as though he had been here all along. For some reason, Frank could put faces to those names she mentioned. Brian Pruitt was her husband, who was in Detroit with their son Benny.

“I have a grandson? Benny.”

Darlene looked a bit disappointed. “Gee, Dad, I’m sure he’d love to hear that his Grandpa forgot he exists. It’s not like we send pictures every year.”

They walked on in silence for a while. The crowd was filled with people running back and forth with firecrackers, some huddled together around street performers, some shops still with their Christmas décor still up. And up on a tall building, the ball drop was being prepared for the midnight countdown into the New Year. 2020 was written in sparkly letters at the top.

Darlene sighed. “Dad, I know things haven’t been the best between you and Mum, or you and me, all our lives. But I’m trying here. It took me years to come to terms with the fact that that’s how things would always be, but it never did it for me.”

Frank didn’t know how to respond. He felt like he barely knew her because he actually didn’t know her.

“You know, if I want to be honest Dad, there’s a lot I haven’t said in years that I need to let out. I grew up angry with myself, and angry with … with you, too. My face was a constant reminder that I have a problem. That I would never find love. That this was why our family broke apart, and why I went through life without a Dad. It kept telling me that I did have a father, and he hated me.”

He was shaken. The problem is me, child. Not you. It was me all along.

“But God healed me,” she said. “He heals me. Maybe not my face, but my heart. I’ve still had my periods where I fight with the reality that this face is going with me through my whole life, and I want to get angry. I think of how you never showed up for my graduation, or even my wedding, or every other things that’s important to me. Until I realised that I was trapped. I was letting my pain keep me from moving on to the much more that God has for me.

“But I look at all He’s blessed me with – life, joy, hope, my f… our family – and I see that He’s never left me alone. He’s never left us alone. Dad, I know it doesn’t always have to be this way.” She held his hand. “But I think you need to know that, whatever it is you feel you’ve done, I’ve forgiven you. I want you to know that you don’t have to shut yourself away from us. You don’t have to, Dad. I want my son to have his Grandpa. I know that we can.”

Frank didn’t know he had been crying until he realised he’d shed a tear. “I’m so sorry, Darlene,” he said.

“Me too, Dad.”

“No, I’m sorry for the years we’ve lost. I was so … I needed to get over myself, but I didn’t know how to.”

Darlene nodded, tears in her eyes. “God can help us. We can do this together, Dad. He can help us.”

And she embraced him.

For the first time in 37 years, he felt light. That burden that had been building up for three decades was gone. His daughter was with him. She loved him. They were willing to find a way to make it work.

He didn’t know what would happen, or if they would ever really make it work. He didn’t know what the future held. But what did he have left, except to trust God and see what He could do? If God truly is, and He had a purpose in time, Frank had no option but to wait and see.

Meanwhile, the countdown to the ball drop had already begun.

“5…

“4…

“3…

“2…

“1…”

The End …?

An Afterword.

PORTAL (4 of 6): Back in Time

PREVIOUSLY:

With no hope of returning to their home timeline, Tolu and Riley take the only option available to them: to travel back in time and relive their favourite memories with the people and I the places they miss the most.

But the past is not always comforting. Little do they know of the trauma they will face.

It was the summer of 2015.

Riley Harris was at her high school prom, and the assembly hall was decorated in glittery banners and disco lights. The school hadn’t done proms in a long time, but ever since that 30-something new guy became principal, Southside High had begun to embrace many more ideas from the students in their programmes. And so the graduation ceremony was followed by an evening party they had decided to call their prom.

She especially loved this party because it was the first time she actually remembered having fun at a party. The first time she had an actual boozer, and not one from her Dad’s stash atop the fridge that she’d stolen a sip from. A full one this time.

Mandy and Shannon, her two best friends had come looking hot in ‘80s-themed outfits. She had won a dinner gown, but made her head up in puffy rolls to go with the ’80s fashion they were going for. She still had pictures of that day.

Watching it all play out one more time brought the memories closer. Standing there on the dance floor brought it even much more closely. What even made it better was that she could still interact with the inanimate objects, like the drinks in the bar. It sucked that everyone around her now was an after-image, flickering like static holograms, but who cared? She came back here to have a great time, and a great time was going to be had.

Oh, there was Gavin. She could still remember him. The hottie she’d always wanted to be noticed by. How she had been expecting a kiss or something that night, just like in the movies. How she had gone back home alone. And also…

Oh no! Now she knew why she had felt antsy about coming here.

“Get me out, Justin!”

A flood of blurry images wafted before her eyes until she was somewhere else.

It was now August 2018.

Rosetta Rhodes was in town for Rock Fest ’18. The city park was lit in floodlights and sparkling fireworks. Thousands were camped in tents for days, securing their spots for the 5-day rave of the year. Merch and memorabilia were on sale in hundreds of stalls, with no shortage of customers for their business.

It was here that Riley had got her first tattoo. Was she a fan of rock music? Not until today. There was something about the beats and strains that brought her a channel to release the pain and angst she felt often. Standing on the grass now, she could remember her spot over in front closer to the stage. She took a swig of the bottle in her hand. Good thing about this place was that there was no consequence. No matter how much she drank, she actually wasn’t getting drunk. She could do with more of this.

She felt a tap on her shoulder. It was…

“Dad?”

She had not seen him in almost a year now. To see him in the sweatshirt he usually wore, or the one he wore that other day… “Where are you coming from at this time, Riley?”

But as far as she could remember, her father had not been with her at Rock Fest that year. Why would he? He wasn’t supposed to even be here. And since when could flickers interact with her in this place?

She held a hand to her chest to still her pulse. She wasn’t sure she was enjoying this place anymore.

“Justin?”

A flood of blurry images wafted before her eyes until she was somewhere else again/

It was now November of 2018…

—–

Tolu Alade was back in the car on the way to church earlier that evening. He had been in the backseat, fingers tapping rapidly on his phone screen, desperate to beat his previous record on Jumbotron Run™ before they got to church. Seated here now beside the version of himself that was engrossed with his phone, Tolu was more taken with his parents in front. How he missed them, especially the times ahead that he would never get to spend with them now that he was stuck in time.

“Mummy! Daddy!” he cried. But they couldn’t hear him.

He rubbed a tear off his face.

“…I hear it’s pretty serious,” Dad was saying.

“Have you been able to call them?” Mum asked.

“The number isn’t going. Funmi hasn’t been home since he was admitted.”

Tolu knew that the only person his father called ‘Funmi’ was Uncle Femi’s wife. Uncle Femi was his favourite uncle.

Something is wrong with Uncle Femi? He stared at the other him, the one tapping on his phone screen, oblivious to the misfortune awaiting him in only a couple of hours.

“And I’ve been telling him,” Dad said. “He has been overstressing himself. No single off day in 6 months.”

“Ah, Oluwa ma shaanu wa, o (Lord have mercy on us, oh). Awon omo won nko? (What about the children?) Where are they now?” Those were Tolu’s cousins.

“I heard they are staying with some of their friends over there. Ah, I don’t even know what to pray. If Femi wasn’t sick I’d have gone over there to beat him up myself.”

“He’s not a baby anymore, dear.”

“I know. I just wish … I don’t want to lose him too.”

Tolu had not realised his uncle was ill or that his father had been this worried. Had he actually sat through this conversation? Tolu didn’t remember this part.

“For years in school, I had to be shuttling to Zaria to get him his inhaler refill. He always forgot, saying he was too busy. I told him busyness would kill him one day. You see him now?”

“Femi will not die in Jesus’ Name! Don’t talk like that!” She placed a hand on his shoulder. “I know you’re just worried for him.”

It was when Dad turned to her that he noticed his son playing on his phone.

“Kinni problem omo yii?! (What’s the problem with this kid?!) You’re still playing phone?!”

He reached toward him and snatched the phone. Tolu watched with disgust as his younger self yelled at his father. “Ah-ah! Daddy it’s not fair!”

Now, even Tolu understood his father’s rage. Playing a game at a time when Dad was bothered by something serious did have a ring of lackadaisicality to it.

Mom turned. “Toluwanimi? Is that how you will be wasting your time? Playing game?”

“It’s even using WiFi,” Dad noticed. “Ah, it’s my hotspot! You’re wasting my money on this nonsense? Why did I even buy you a phone?”

“Toluwanimi! Instead of you to use internet to find things for your future, you’re busy wasting your brain on these things?”

“In fact, I’m seizing it. You will cry before you get it back. Nonsense.”

And the Tolu of that time was sulking and kicking his mother’s seat. The Tolu of now was so embarrassed.

“I can’t … I can’t watch this,” he said.

A flood of blurry images. He was somewhere else now.

—–

Riley sat by the bar at Lorenzo’s, tracing her hand around the cover of her bottle.

The bartender came over to talk with another customer. Of course, he couldn’t see her. She laid her head on the bar, exhausted. Even downing a cold one had lost its appeal. These time jumps were draining her more than she expected.

This time she had chosen to be somewhere different from her memory of this time. Right about now, the Riley of March 18, 2019 was in a party across the road. But this Riley, the Riley at the bar, was avoiding those moments. Sadly she was doomed to only go to times and places she had previously been. This sucked.

“Hey there, beautiful!”

She slammed a fist on the table. “Are you kidding me?” She knew it was her Dad before she turned to look at him. In all the eight time-jaunts she had taken now, he had shown up. Even in places he had never been in her original memory. Sure enough, he was still in that green sweatshirt. “Have you no shame talking to your daughter that way?”

He still had that grin on his face. “Wanna see something you’ve never seen before?”

Why did that sound familiar? She spat in his face and swore.

“Oh … but I’m tired.” She stopped. That had been her voice. But she hadn’t said it, had she?

She turned and saw another version of herself seated at the same bar, still dressed in the gown she had worn to prom years ago. She was tipsy, head flailing.

Oh no. This was not supposed to be happening.

Dad held the other Riley’s hand. “It’s OK, lass. My, my, you really have matured, haven’t you?”

OH MY GOD, NO!!!

She hurried over to stop them, but they were already gone from the bar. No one else in the room was reacting to her or to the scene. She scanned the room, searching frantically for them. She couldn’t believe this. Her memory from prom night was crashing into this place.

This is all wrong, no, No, NO…

A green flash by the toilets across the room grabbed her attention. It was Dad leading her younger self away. He turned and flashed her a grin.

Riley shut her eyes and screamed.

Justin held her hands. “It’s OK, it’s OK… Shh, it’s going to be OK. Just breathe, Riley. Breathe.”

When she opened her eyes she was back on the cliff. The night was still dark and quiet. The grump was still on his bench across from a cottage.

She was out of the bar.

“I can’t do this anymore,” she said. “That was supposed to be my quiet place. He wasn’t supposed to be there. But he was everywhere. He followed me everywhere!”

“It’s OK, Riley. Just breathe, gently.”

—–

Tolu was getting more disgusted with himself.

In all the memories he had gone back to, he always found himself on his phone during important moments, either playing a game or on social media. They had seemed like the most important things at the time, but now?

Here they were back in April 2019. He found the Tolu of that time playing a medieval war game on the TV as his Dad drove into the compound. Dad rested his head on the steering wheel for a moment. He knew what would happen next. Dad would come in and spank him for not opening the gate for him, pack up the PlayStation system and lock it up in his room until the holidays. Tolu used to see this as Dad’s standard wickedness. But now?

Now he wondered what got his Dad so worried. He wished he could go over and talk to him, to ask him how he was doing. He realised that he had had the opportunity before. But now it was too late.

“Looks like someone has a problem.” Justin was with him now. “We always find you online or playing a game.”

“It looks all suck-ish right now. I mean, there’s nothing wrong with playing games now and then, right?”

Justin arched a brow. “Are you actually asking me?”

“I don’t know. But my Dad was really going through some stuff. Uncle is probably dying. Mum is just trying to keep the peace. And look at me: wasting my time playing video games? I was missing out on so much. If I knew then what I know now…”

Justin stared at the boy playing games. “This doesn’t look leisurely. Looks to me like you were doing this deliberately.”

Tolu leaned forward. “You think so?”

“I mean, you’ve always had all these resources. You’ve got books, encyclopaedia and internet access. So much to do with what’s available to you. Why were games your go-to?”

He observed the game playing on TV. Age of Empires had always been his favourite.

“I guess, when I really think about it, these games are the only world I can really control. Y’know? Where I actually know what to do. Like once I get the skills and know the rules, I can just plunge in and win. Each new level is a new challenge. But once you know how to do what you need to do, you’re can just go and win it.”

“A world you can control? That’s odd. Are you saying you wanted to be … well, like God?”

“No, now. But like… in this real world, outside of my games, I don’t know what to do. I don’t know the ‘how-tos’ or walkthroughs. I don’t know what I’m supposed to be doing here. I don’t know what I’m supposed to become or what I should be doing. As a matter of fact, when I think about the future … I think I’m … actually afraid.”

They were quiet for a bit.

Until Justin spoke. “And that, my friend, is the reason you’re stuck in my Timescape. Your fear of the future is something you’ve not been able to escape.”

—–

Riley was shaking now, crying, desperate to get out of this traumatic horror.

“Why did my Dad show up in those places? You never told me this would happen.”

Justin shook his head. “Believe me, I had nothing to do with that. The—”

“I haven’t seen him in over a year. I deliberately do not go home because he’s still there. I can’t bear to look at the face of that man, and yet he follows me everywhere here? Why would you do that to me?”

Justin sat in the grass beside her. “That prom night, what did your father do?”

She took a breath, and the tears rolled. The strong hard front she always kept up was to prevent this from happening. The last time she’d spoken about this that very next day, to her Mom. But she hadn’t believed her. She tried to speak, but she couldn’t. My father raped me. My own father raped me. But she couldn’t voice it now.

Justin must have gotten the picture because he just nodded knowingly and said nothing for a while.

“What he did left its scar,” he said eventually. “The pain still lingers, wherever you are. It keeps you from moving forward, that’s clear. Riley, that pain is why you’re still here.”

She stared at him, the implications of that falling into place. “What?”

“Riley, it’s not your fault. You were hurt by someone you trusted. But the pain keeps you stuck in the past. A tumor that’s growing like a grain of … mustard?”

“You’re saying I got trapped in this blasted place because of … this? Because of pain?” But Justin didn’t reply this time. He just stared, concerned. “It’s not like I’m a wounded animal or something. I don’t think about him all the time. I go weeks without giving him a thought.”

“But look how the very idea of him still affects you. You find it hard to love or trust. Riley, you’re wounded more than you even know. You know it’s true. You see that. You must.”

She sniffed again, rubbing her eyes. “I really could use a drink right now.”

“Riley, for months you haven’t gone a day without a drink. Why do you do that? What do you think?”

She sniffed, thinking about all the time since then. She really didn’t trust people, especially men anymore ever since. Every little tryst she’d gotten into since then had been momentary, just for kicks. She partied hard to get away from all the hypocrisy and pretentiousness in the world around her. But after the highs and hangovers, the pain was always still there. She never escaped it.

“I drink to forget,” she said, rubbing her eyes. “It’s why I party. The thrill, the fun, that’s my one escape.”

They were quiet for a moment. Was that really the problem? Had she gotten locked out of the future because of ‘pain’? What kind of existential nonsense is this place?

“So what do you expect me to do? Just let it go? Like it’s so easy? Like I haven’t actually been trying?”

Justin stared ahead at the expanse before them. “Obviously, that didn’t work. It comes back time and again. But what if, just what if, there was something more to all this? What if something could heal you of your pain, and give you the strength to go on?”

“Even if that were true, what if I don’t want to go back?”

“What if there was something worth going back to? What if you could face the future without all that’s bound you?”

—–

Tolu was still back in March 2019, watching his Mum cooking in the kitchen. At that time he had been ostensibly working on his homework while actually chatting with his friends online. “You know,” he said. “if fear of the future is what’s holding me back, in a very small way I’m actually not surprised. I mean look at me. I’ve grown up believing what they said, that God has this Big Plan for my life. That all things work together for good. But in the real world, what does that even mean? How am I supposed to even know what that plan is?”

Justin folded his arms. “If your Maker has a plan, or a way you should follow, would He make it difficult for you to know?”

Tolu shrugged. “I don’t know.”

“No, think about it. Don’t let this slide. If He really loves you like He said does, would He leave you to your life without showing you the guide?”

“I guess He wouldn’t.”

“Exactly. If there’s something that conquers fear, it’s God’s love for you. Your Bible makes it clear.”

“You know, I think I’ve heard of that verse.”

“Oh?”

“I’ll admit, I don’t read my Bible as much as I should.”

Justin only sighed. “You’re like the boy whose eyes were shut, afraid to open them and see. When he’s asked to move, he doesn’t know where he is or where he’s supposed to be.”

Tolu smirked. “If I recall correctly, that was you that time, not me.” But then he realised what was going on. Justin had been mirroring his own disposition all along.

“If you truly believe in God’s love for you, trusting your future in His hands shouldn’t be hard to do.”

“Just like that? I should just ‘trust’ my future in His hands? And I won’t be afraid anymore?”

“We only trust people we really know. Tolu, is God Someone you’ve tried to know?”

Tolu knew that he had not really given this much attention. If he really believed that God had a plan, why hadn’t he actually tried to find out? Spending his time in virtual worlds kept him occupied all this time, but they never answered the question that bugged him. But it felt more fun than reading the Bible. At least there were immediate visible results for every action in those games.

Tolu shook his head. “Pursuing someone you can’t see is … difficult.”

“How about trusting what He’s said? And going into the unknown, knowing you are led.”

Tolu sighed. “The thought of it feels like stepping off a cliff.”

Justin smiled. “Precisely.”

—–

“You cannot be serious right now,” Riley exclaimed.

But he was. “It’s the only path forward. When I said that portal was the only way, I wasn’t lying.”

“You expect me to literally step off this cliff? That’s what you’re saying, that I should just … die?”

They were still at the Edge of Time, staring past the misty expanse at the light strobe connecting the sky to whatever earth lay below.

“What if this is the only way to truly live? You’ve trusted my logic this far. Is this one too hard to believe?”

“So you do want me to die?”

Justin leaned back on his arms. “Remember when you were sure you would get out? When the sight of the portal was exhilarating? But when you got to this cliff, you gave up hope. It was a cost you considered not worth taking.”

“This wasn’t even a choice. It was a freaking cliff. How do I drive from a cliff to get to that portal?”

“It’s not so much about the stepping off as it is trusting the one that called you in the first place. You got here believing in a way out, and all the time since. Why should it be different in this case?”

“Even if I end up splat at the bottom?”

“Who says there is a bottom?”

She stood and walked over to the cliff’s edge. There was no end in sight to its depth, he was right. Only the mist. But the portal across from her also looked so inviting, the possibilities it could hold. Somehow she was supposed to believe that the portal would help her out?

“Riley?”

She turned and saw that Nigerian kid, Tolu. She couldn’t define the relief she felt at seeing him again. “Tolu? Where’ve you been?” she asked.

“My past, same as you,” he said. “And my guess is we each saw what we needed to see.” He joined her at the cliff’s edge. “Are you thinking what I’m thinking too?”

She looked back at the boy. “They do say that when you fall off a cliff in your dreams you wake up, right?”

He stared over the edge. “Funny, for something that should cure my fear, I’m actually afraid. But I don’t trust if I’m not ready to take a leap, right?”

She took a breath. “Trust? That’s a tall order.”

“I know. But what choice do we have?”

They knew what they had to do.

>>The journey hurtles ever closer to an end, here.

PORTAL (3 of 6): Just in Time

PREVIOUSLY:

Tolu and Riley hurried as quickly as they could to reach the portal, but in the end it was all for nought. They stop at a steep cliff, contemplating the futility of their quest when they meet a man who claims to have been stuck in this place for 37 years!

All hope of returning to the life they knew may be lost.

“Thirty Seven years?!” Tolu Alade’s hands were on his head as he contemplated the possibilities. “We could be here for thirty seven freaking years?!”

Tolu realised he would never see his parents again. He realised this place had always existed, for at least thirty seven years, and at least one person had been trapped here in all that time. He realised that he was in more trouble than he knew. He turned to Riley. “But the boy—“

“I swear, when I get my hands on that blasted ankle-biter…” Let’s just say she had choice words to describe how she would dismember him.

The man shook his head. “So you’ve met the boy too? It figures.”

“For a moment I thought maybe you were the boy,” Tolu said.

“I’d rather lick the toilet. That kid has been a pain in my behind all these years.”

“37 years?!”

He humphed. “I remember when I was just like you. How afraid you must have felt when you saw the world changing around you. The exhilaration you felt at the possibility of beating the odds to get to that portal and back to the world you knew. That little glimmer that, if you tried harder, somehow you would get back to the way things used to be.” He shook his head. “But that portal, that light beam, just stands there to mock you. To make you think this could actually end, until reality dashes them here. It’s a fever dream, this business of … hope.” He spat that last word.

“You’re really not helping.” Riley’s voice broke, on the verge of tears.

“I never offered you help. If you’re looking for comfort, kiss my asphalt. There is no comfort, or hope, or light anywhere around here. Take it from me. There’s nothing I haven’t tried. You will all come back to where I am. You’ll see that nothing really matters. In the end, all of this, all of life is futile.”

Tolu was arms akimbo, staring out at the expanse beyond the precipice. There really was nothing beyond this point. “So this is it. The actual Edge of Time.” He thought about how long he had lived his life not knowing there was anything beyond the mundane. How much time he had wasted weighed on him, especially now that he realised that time was limited. Nothing in all his life had prepared him for this. He had barely eaten in all this time but he didn’t even feel hungry.

“Why us?” he asked. “What did we do to deserve this?”

The man shrugged. “Kid, you’re going to go the rest of your life wondering the same thing. ‘Why me?’ I used to think I missed a portal into the next year, but that’s just absurd. The calendar is man-made and not an existential absolute. Theoretically, there should be such waves every 24 hours, nothing special. But on what basis do we get left out? Morality? Whose standard of morality? Body chemistry? Mental acuity? This unforgiving universe doesn’t offer much answers, does it?”

Tolu turned to Riley, but she was majorly fuming and muttering to herself. He was actually concerned now. “Now would be the perfect time for your boy to show up.”

The man chuckled, but with disgust. “Oh, the irony. Turning up now is so like him.” He took a breath. “He’s right behind you.”

As one they turned and saw the boy standing, with his arms behind his back. He grinned sheepishly and waved. “Hi everyone,” he said.

“Why you little…” Riley hurried to her feet and charged at him, swinging a fist in his face. But the boy wasn’t there anymore.

“I’m so sorry I’ve annoyed you to no end,” the boy said, now seated on the park bench beside the man. “Oh hello, Frank, my dear old friend.”

Tolu blinked. “He does talk in rhyme.” The fact that his translocation was the least amusing fact now wasn’t lost on him. The world had been all kinds of crazy already.

“It’s getting him to shut up that’s the trick,” Frank muttered.

Riley’s hand was still in a fist. “You tricked me. You made me think I was getting out of here.”

The boy was actually smiling. He was actually having fun at their misery. “That’s oversimplifying it really, but I did say you were in for a ride. The sights, the road trip, the adrenaline. Like, isn’t fun what you’ve always wanted, deep down inside?”

Riley shook her head. Whatever spunk she had was gone. “You’re sick. In a bad way.”

“Did you do all of this?” Tolu asked. “Who are you, really?”

The boy still sat, swinging a leg in the grass. “Sometimes I just want to pause and play, and see if I actually can. I’m always flying when you’re having fun, and I’m wired to wait for no man.”

“What does that even mean?” Riley glared.

Tolu’s eyes widened after a moment of thought. “Time.” He stole a glance at Frank who still looked away. “Think about it. Time flies while you’re having fun. Time waits for no man. It’s like a riddle, right?” He suddenly realised what this all meant. “Are you kidding me? Are you serious right now? You are Time?” Tolu said the words, and the fact that absurdity made sense in this mad world astounded him.

Riley’s face lit up with dawning realisation. “You’re joking.”

Frank still didn’t look up.

“You can call me Justin, please,” the boy said with a shrug. “It just rolls off the tongue with ease.”

“You’re Time and you are Justin?” Riley bit the bait. “Justin Time? Are you serious right now?”

The boy slapped his knee on that one. “She got that one! Ha! Finally, someone gets my pun!”

Tolu was still amused that an abstract concept stretching millennia could be standing before him, here, and in this form. “He really is just a kid. Even thinks like one.”

“What, you think I age like you guys do?”

“How is that possible? What’s going on?”

“You’re really taking this in stride, aren’t ya?” Riley eyed Tolu.

“I just want to get back to my family,” he said. “I’m trying to make as much sense of this as you are.”

“Don’t do that to yourself,” Frank said. “Don’t give yourself Hope. That’s the worst thing you can do in this place.”

Justin shook his head. “Ok, yes where were we? You wanted to know what’s happening, oui? The Timescape is what you see around. You can call this my own playground.”

“But why me? Why us?”

“What you humans don’t understand is that time is linked by pathways. These ‘portals’ connect each second. It’s your path to each new day.”

“I never needed to find a portal before,” Riley said. “And I’d been living just fine.”

“You’ve never needed to, Riley. It’s the same with everyone. But something in your space this time stopped you from moving on.”

“What did?”

“Space,” Tolu chewed on the word. “You’re talking about the time-space continuum?” He had wanted to sound smart, throwing in some science fiction lingo to keep up with the conversation. But hearing it now he realised he really hadn’t needed to.

Justin winced. “Time’s always tied to space, in science this is true. But the component you often miss is that your Time is tied to you.”

Riley folded her arms. “This is really freaking me out,” she said.

“A time to be born, a time to die. A time to laugh, a time to cry. The process intervening these is you, my friends. It’s true.” He nodded. “It is.”

Frank grunted. “Like that’s supposed to mean something.”

“So we’re trapped here in 2019?” Riley surmised. “And we can’t get back?”

“Yes, this is 2019,” the boy said, standing on the bench now. “In many ways, that’s true. It’s the very last second, but it is so much more, too. In this Timescape, I’m not tied to your laws. I come and go when and how I want. I run, reverse, or pause. Every moment of every age has left remnants all through history. In this dimension we’re not bound to serial chronology.”

In any other scenario Tolu would have loved the rhythm of his words, but it was more distracting if anything.

Riley was pacing now. “So where does that leave us. Stuck here for years to become like the Grump here? No offence.”

Frank didn’t even flinch. “I’ll take it.”

Justin was balancing on one leg now. “Aaargh, you lot are so boring! Can’t you see the fun? So many times and realities before you. This isn’t the only one.”

“Except the future,” Frank said. “That’s the one we’ve all missed.”

“Wait,” Riley took a step forward. “Are you saying we can travel back in time?”

Justin cocked his head. “That’s oversimplifying. I’m saying now’s as 2019 as it’s 1999.”

Tolu exhaled. “Am I ever going back? Back to my parents and the life I had?”

Justin tapped his head. “I may not promise the future, but what about the past? You missed out on the coming moments, but what about the last? In a flash you can be with your family in the places you loved the most.”

“And risk the weirdness of feeling like a disembodied ghost?” Frank added.

Justin was actually leaping now. “You actually rhymed that time!”

Frank shook his head. “I refuse to let your weirdness get to me.” He might have smiled that time, Tolu wasn’t sure.

What a world it had become. Tolu wondered why he had never been told that there was a layer like this to the world he knew. The possibility that he would never be with his family again felt like hell. What if this was hell?

God, are you there? Are you here?

“I’ll go,” Riley said.

Tolu shot her a double-take. “What? Where?”

Her eyes were still teary and her eye makeup ruined, but she wasn’t smiling anymore. “He’s right. There’s really no place else to go from here. It’s over. Might as well enjoy it while we can. It’s gonna be a long one.”

“Are you serious? You’re going back in time?”

“Well it’s better than sitting on our nubs and navelgazing at how hopeless it is.”

Justin leapt to her side. “Now this is my kind of girl. You ready to go for a whirl?”

She still looked on him with disdain. “Just get me out of this dump.”

“WAIT!” Tolu yelled.

And just like that, Riley was gone.

Don’t leave me here. He had only known her for a few moments, but somehow she had become the closest connection to the sanity he missed, the only connection he still had to the world that was. And now she was gone.

“Another one bites the dust,” Frank said, leaning back in his seat.

Tolu felt awkward standing before him. “So what happens now?”

“Now, you get to decide what you want,” Justin was suddenly behind him. Tolu actually shrieked in shock. “You can stay or we could take a chrono-jaunt.”

Tolu’s hand was on his chest as he tried to still his breathing. “Must you always be like that? Wh-where’s Riley?”

“Her time is not the same as your own. Each of you has to go it alone. Come, Tolu, tell me, where would you rather be?”

He stared out over the precipice and the empty expanse. He had come face to face with reality gone insane, and he felt exposed. He was not prepared for any of this.

“I just want my Dad and my Mummy.”

Justin walked over to him, concern in his eyes. Tolu wasn’t sure if he was about to mock him when Justin suddenly embraced him. “There, there.”

And they were gone.

Frank smirked, crossing his legs once again.

“Yet another one takes the bait,” he muttered.

Justin was back, seated beside him. “Hope I’m not too late.”

“Stop doing that!”

Justin raised his hands. “Sorry, that’ll do. But I think my charisma is rubbing off on you, eh?”

“You’re trying to give them hope, and that’s worse. The façade will crack and they’d see just what a hard-knock life it is. You didn’t tell them the horror they would see. What it would do to them.”

Justin nodded, staring in the distance. “Quite a hard-knock life it is. But I find the hardest knocks are with your knees.”

Frank stared over at him. “What’s that even supposed to mean?”

Justin shrugged. “Sounded deep. Might come in handy sometime.” He nudged him. “Get it? Some time?”

Frank shook his head. “I hate you.” He kept his eyes on the old cottage before him.

The journey continues here.

PORTAL (1 of 6): Pause

Tuesday, December 31

Tolu Alade would rather be anywhere but here, especially at this hour. On any other day he should be asleep in bed, but he figured because it was the last day of the year his parents considered it best to spend the night praying in church. But no one ever gave him a choice because there really was none, now was there?

“We are going to praaaaay,” Pastor Oladele’s voice rang, from the stage below. “That every sorrow that followed you throughout 2019 will end with this year.”

All around Tolu, the men and women on the gallery and across the large auditorium clasped their hands in prayer, muttering their affirmation. Everyone was decked in jackets, not because of the cold but rather to ward off mosquito bites. He couldn’t recognise most of them, as many were visitors from the neighbourhood who would probably not return to church until Easter.

Such was the norm every year at the December 31^st Cross-Over Service.

He tried to pay attention, but some boys playing a game on a phone a few rows away caught his eye. Tolu smirked. That’s what he’d rather have been doing if Dad hadn’t seized his phone before they entered the church. To think that somebody’s parents had no issues with that.

“Some of you don’t know the importance of that prayer,” the pastor continued. “When the Israelites were escaping from Egypt the Lord said, ‘These Egyptians you see today, you shall see them no more!’”

“Amen!” the church chorused.

“There are some things you have to drop. Some things to let go…”

Tolu thought about what he was looking forward to in the coming year. There weren’t that many great movies coming out, except maybe WW84 and Black Widow. This time last year, his mind had been taken with the possibilities of Avengers: Endgame and how its story would turn out. And while it beat his expectations, he could not think of any other movie that held his fancy in the coming year. So beyond movies, what else did he look forward to?

Ok, by this time next year he should be out of secondary school. He couldn’t imagine life outside of the six-year school bubble, but whatever lay beyond had to be better. But what did lie ahead? Exams? Maybe University? Adulthood … ugh. As far as he was concerned it could all stay in the arbitrary future where it always did.

He didn’t even know what he wanted to be in future? A pilot, a veterinary doctor, a teacher (God forbid, he thought)? He hadn’t the foggiest, and he chose not to think about it much.

He checked his watch. 11:55pm. In 5 minutes the year when he would have to face all these decisions sped ever closer.

The cacophony of fireworks and banging knockouts from outside carried on in the background. Yes, perhaps he wished he could get lost in the moment too, playing with bangers bothering not the slightest about anything. Why did the future always feel scary and abstract?

Well, here it comes.

Pastor always did this, getting them into a prayer point that would keep them all praying as the seconds ticked past midnight. It would be about five praying minutes into the day that he would then shout, “Happy New Year!” and then the church would be agog with everyone greeting their neighbours, hugging their loved ones and altogether welcoming one another into the New Year.

Tolu clutched his eyes shut as the seconds ticked.

The prayers faded to a lull.

He opened his eyes.

And blinked. Two things dawned on him in that moment.

First, there was a power outage and church was cloaked in darkness. The only light in which he saw were the rays of moonlight casting patterned shadows of the window frame into the building as they filtered through. Power outages were commonplace in his country, so that was not the biggest surprise.

He was taken with the fact that something was wrong with everyone else. They were still standing where they were alright, but they were … flickering. One second they were there, they were gone for two, back for another two, gone for a microsecond, and back again.

Perhaps it was the lighting, but there was none. Tolu turned. It was happening all around him. And they weren’t moving either. They were frozen in their last pose, and they flickered.

Tolu rubbed out whatever sleepiness remained in his eyes.

Is this really happening right now?

He looked down at his hands, but he wasn’t flickering. Everyone else was. He hesitated a moment before reaching out to tap the huge man beside him.

His hand went through. The man still flickered, but then something changed. The man was gone. And so was everyone else. Tolu was alone now.

Now he knew that he truly was in trouble.

What just happened?!

He was standing among seats in the gallery of his church auditorium, and he was alone. Church was empty. The last strains of the murmur of the crowd faded away like a distant echo. Everyone was just … gone. He really was alone.

He felt a chill run down his spine. His pulse thumped in his chest. God…

He hurried away from his seat scanning the rows around him, trying to make sense of it all. He stared over the balcony. Church was exactly as it would have been, except that now it was empty. A microphone was rolling off the stage. The bass guitarist was gone, but his guitar lay broken on the floor. There were no clothes on the seats, just Bibles and bags. The whole church was empty. The silence around him was deafening. His breathing thickened.

No … it can’t be!

It took all he had to keep himself from vaulting over the railing. He hurried down the staircase, high on adrenaline.

“Mum? Mummy?! Daddy!!!”

The moonlight shining through the high windows illumined the empty seats before him.

Everybody’s gone! How?!

He ran through the auditorium passing rows and rows of empty chairs, his footsteps echoing in the vacuum. A buzz still played from the audio speakers. He picked a phone from a chair. 23:59, the lock-screen read. Where was everyone? Where were his Mum and Dad?

This has to be a dream. Please let this be a dream!

He had grown up hearing stories about a Bible prophecy that when Jesus returned all the true believers would vanish and go to heaven, and the rest of the world would remain, or something like that. They called it the Rapture, and that was the only idea that played at the back of his mind.

“No … no…” He stared at his quivering palm. What is going on?

He struggled to breathe as he sank to the floor, picking through the details he could recall. Within a second something had caused the power to go out and simultaneously to make everyone flicker out of vision. Were they just invisible or did they just disappear? Was this a prank? Had they planned this? Was it even possible? There had to be some explanation. He needed to come up with an explanation. He frantically searched the chairs around him again.

Now he screamed.

“Hello?”

He turned. There was a boy seated a few rows away, his eyes shut.

Oh, thank God!

Overcome with the relief of seeing someone, anyone, and desperate to hide his fear Tolu rubbed the tears from his own eyes. “Hey! Hey, did you see where they went?” He hurried towards the boy.

“No,” the boy’s voice squeaked. “Where did everybody go?”

Tolu wasn’t up for comforting, so looking out for the kid’s feelings was the last thing on his mind. “I don’t know. I don’t understand. Did you see it too?” The boy shook his head. “You didn’t see them vanish? Disappear?”

“I didn’t see anybody disappear. I closed my eyes and was hiding here.”

The boy’s eyes were still shut. Did he think closing his eyes would change what was going on around them? Was he that afraid? “When you closed your eyes, how will you see?” Tolu sat beside him, more to calm himself than the boy. “You can open your eyes.”

“No…”

“It’s dark but we can still see. Ok? Just open your eyes. We have to find—“

“No!”

His sudden retort jolted Tolu. “What?”

“NO! I don’t want to!” His face softened. “I don’t know what to do.”

Tolu was confused, but he had more to worry about than the insecurities of a scared brat. His insistence was becoming irritating by the second. “I don’t have time for this.” Tolu hissed and hurried out the church door. He could come back to check on the kid later. He needed his parents. Where were they?

Where is everyone? Was it a prank? Could they even do that?

All the apocalyptic and dystopian stories he had watched and read collided in his mind. Could this really happening?

The paved ground of the church compound stretched out before him with cars parked in formation along the wall. No streetlamps were on, except for a strobe shining into the sky somewhere in the distance. Probably an End-of-Year rave. Papers wafted in the breeze, but there was no one in sight. Not even a sound. The dark night sky still loomed overhead and he shivered in the cold breeze. It was eerily quiet outside. He struggled to breathe. It’s going to make sense. It has to make sense.

He ran to the gatehouse. Uncle Stanley, the gateman was there, thank God, but he was flickering too. In his last pose he had been leaning in to his radio and was still stuck there. Static radio noise blared. He was flickering. Outside the gate everyone else was frozen, flickering. Some mid-jump, some grinning, everyone celebrating the coming New Year, but now frozen.

He ran back in and saw people back in church, flickering. He grabbed his head in his hands.

Was this happening everywhere?

Frantic, he paced back and forth trying to understand all of this. Someone was playing a cosmic joke, and he was the target. His hands were quavering now.

In his mind he asked God’s forgiveness for his sins over and over.

—–

Riley gripped the steering wheel of the Suburban as she made her way over a bumpy road. She was in unfamiliar territory now, but that didn’t matter anyhow. The world had gone insane for her hours ago, and she was getting used to knowing that losing her grip on sanity was the closest thing to a grip she would get now.

Insane? So was the world. The town zipped behind her in a blur as she sped. There were more potholes here.

How long had it been now? She checked the clock. 11:59. Why’d I expect something different?

The bottle on the dashboard filled her vision, but the last thing she could afford right about now was to drive drunk. But she really could use a drink right about now. When the flickerings began she had first thought she was high, but this was the worst trip she had ever been on.

She sniggered. ‘Trip’, ha. I made a funny.

She peered at the sky again. The beacon still appeared further away.

But something caught her eye. A dark boy sat by the curb ahead, hands resting on his knees, rocking back-and-forth. It was after she was a few yards ahead that she realised why he stood out. After hours passing flickering after-images on the road, this was the first person she met that was actually still moving.

And he wasn’t flickering.

She swung into reverse and pulled up beside him. He raised his head and his tear-filled eyes widened as realisation dawned. She recognised the feeling, but she was more relieved to find someone else.

“You’re not flickering,” she noted.

He shot to his feet. “Oh thank God!” He had a weird accent. “Thank God! Please … what’s going on? Do you know?”

“Not a freaking after-image…” She reached out to touch his hand.

He recoiled. “I-I don’t know what’s happening. We were just in church for Cross-Over, and everything started happening. Everybody started disappearing and appearing. I thought I was running mad. I thought I was left behind. I thought I was alone!” He was crying, trying to squeeze his words in.

“How long’s it been?”

“I don’t know. Thirty minutes? My watch is broken.”

“Makes two of us.” She shoved her phone in his face. The clock on the lock screen read 11:59. He actually looked more confused, if that were possible. But Riley was on to something else. “For me it’s been hours.”

“HOURS?!”

“Have you seen the boy?”

“The boy? Which boy?”

“Ten-ish? Annoying? Talks in rhyme?”

His shock answered her question before he did. “That boy? Him? He was just with me here…” He turned only to realise that somehow this was not where he thought he was. “Where’s? I was just… Where am I? Church was just … here!” He paced frantically, his hands on his head. “This is a nightmare. This is mad!”

The first time she saw the reality shifts she too had thought she was going insane.

“I know it’s a lot to take in, but I’m going to need you to answer me, and fast. Now do you know where we are?”

He ran a hand across his face. “I was … we were in Bodija.” He must have seen the confusion on her face because he continued. “Ibadan … Nigeria?” He was still pacing. “What is happening?! My family was in that church. I have to go back! I have to…”

Nigeria? Ah, here we go then. She shook her head, tapping her fingers on the steering wheel. Her theory was correct. “Ok, this is how it’s going to be, so listen well. Somehow you and I are stuck in time at 11:59. Reality is shifting all around us because time has stood still. For us at least. In case you don’t get the gravity of this all, I was in Brisbane just hours ago and I’ve only been on the road all this time. I don’t understand it all, I’m piecing it together as I go along, but the only thing I have to go on is that that portal over there—“ she pointed at the strobe that lit the sky in the distance. “— is our only way out of this. I would tell you more but my understanding is that we have a window and it probably closes in 24 hours. I don’t know what happens when that window closes, but I sure as hell don’t want to wait to find out. Now, you can sit here crying your eyes out wasting the hours we have like I did, or you can buck up and get in because I’m leaving now.”

He looked about as confused as he probably felt.

“Now, kid!”

>> The journey continues here.